Intentions

"I may not have gone where I wanted to go..."

I have this really, really great client; he's in elementary school and loves to be silly.  The other day, we were describing objects to each other and he described a Furby (one of those nasty owl/cat looking things) as a "girl's toy".  He then asked if it was my daughter's toy.  I replied that it wasn't and that I didn't have any children.  He asked, "Why not?"  I responded that I wasn't married and that I didn't want to have children until I was married.  (Here's the best part!)  This wonderful client of mine then asked how old I was, and I told him I was 23.  He proceeded to slap his forehead with the palm of his hand and moan in exasperation.  I laughed and we continued on with the session.

To be honest, I never thought I would be 24, single, still in school, and living at home.  I thought I would at least have my own place by now and be working for a major newspaper writing the most-read column in the nation.  Oh how my life has not gone where I wanted it to go.

But if my life HAD gone where I wanted, I wouldn't be here.  I wouldn't be studying Speech-Language Pathology, I wouldn't have a job that I love, I wouldn't have traveled all over the world, I wouldn't have met hundreds of the amazing people I know and love, I wouldn't have grown as tremendously as I have by working at various LDS youth camps, I wouldn't have struggled and learned what I now know.

Over the past couple of weeks, I have come to realization that I am EXACTLY where I need to be.  It's not necessarily where I want to be, but I'm right where I'm needed.  And I'm 100% okay with that.  Do I still want to get married someday?  You bet.  Do I still want to have children and a family?  Definitely.  But those blessings aren't meant to be mine; not yet, anyway.

So for now, I will be happy with the things I do have.  I will serve to the best of my abilities in the capacities I'm placed.  I will work and strive for the things I want, but also understand that those things will come when I'm ready.

"...but I HAVE ended up where I NEEDED to be."